R.I.P.D(?) Pavilion, Galashiels

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The fashion for films based on comic book characters must surely end here.

The young like their ghosts and their vampires and their special effects, but dead cops solving supernatural crimes in some place you know, but don’t, sort of, sounds like D.B.L (Death By Lunacy).

What hurts worse is that respectable actors – Jeff Bridges, Kevin Bacon, Ryan Reynolds – have been seduced by shed loads of something expensive to accept roles in a movie worthy of landfill. Have they no pride?

The parallel universe, in which an ageing gunslinger (Bridges) partners a murdered detective (Reynolds), is the hunting ground of grotesque giants, disguised in ordinary bodies.

This may sound like a rip off of Men In Black, with one essential difference. MIB is worth watching.

Before dumping R.I.P.D (Rest In Peace Dept) into the bin, marked G.O.O.M.L (Get Out Of My Life), there is a final revelation. These deceased law enforcement officers have avatars in the real world, so that when Reynolds approaches his widow, she sees an old Chinaman. Bridges’ avatar is a sexy blonde. Much better.

The plot, otherwise known as “the rot”, concerns obese giants building a golden tower to bring down the dead from a whirlpool in the sky.

Leave your brain at the door. Better still, leave yourself at home.