Petty parliamentary pugilism time

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This was always going to be an election that would raise the hackles and stir the blood.

And it hasn’t disappointed us so far. Doing my ironing on Sunday morning I watched Boris and Ed discussing their days at school together on a comfy couch – in the studio not at school – but going off in a rant.

If by any chance this pair become the respective heads of their not-so respected parties, then Prime Minister’s Question Time will indeed by a fiery affair. Unfortunately, much like the overly-orchestrated PM Question Times of late, they will simply show our – supposedly – esteemed leaders in a bad light. Unruly school kids who must have thrown the rattle out of their respective prams when they were in nappies.

Is it too much to ask, that our politicians speak with one voice? One voice each. Once voice at a time. Perhaps then, we, Joe Public, would be given at least an opportunity to hear what they are saying about matters that truly affect us all.

Most of our leaders were given a decent education. Many of them actually paid for it – well their parents did. If what we see and hear now is a product of their days in short trousers, it was money wasted.

There is a week to go until polling day, so rest assured there will be much more of this not-so-nice behaviour yet to come. The heat will rise as the day of destiny comes closer.

And at the end of that day – or more properly in the early hours of the next – it is almost certain that our destiny will not have been decided.

Political pundits across the country are pretty certain that neither party – there are only two – will be in a position to form a majority government.

I expect the SNP will be much-courted after despite all the No, No, Nos we have heard.

Whatever the colours of the next government it will be expected to reign for five years.

Is it too much to hope that the discussion between whoever and whoever else, will be conducted cleanly and with decorum?